Ellemental

Some people say 30 is the hardest.  Some say 50.  I even know a guy who said turning 25 years old was horrible – it’s when he realized for the first time that he, too, would continue to age.

Before this year, I hadn’t run into Milestone Birthday Trepidation.  I think it’s because I look young and definitely ACT immature young.  In my head, I’m still 23.  Strong body, strong mind, lots of time to decide what it is I want to do and where I want to do it.  As I make the final run up to 40, though, I’m definitely beginning to get it.

I, too, will continue to age.

So although I feel healthy, I decided that this year will be the year that I make sure I’m a-ok – as healthy as possible as I move into the NEXT 40 years.  So I made a Dr appointment.

Although I understand that preventative measures are better than reactive, I still felt silly making an appointment for just a general checkup.  I felt silly when, after I answered his health questionnaire, the doctor said, “So, you seem to be in great health.”  I definitely felt silly when he asked me if I had any questions or concerns and I showed him the little spot on my leg.

See, I have this little spot on my leg.  I noticed it first last summer when I was shaving my legs, and thought it was a bug bite.  As summer faded away and I scaled back the shaving operations, I mostly forgot about it.  I knew it was there, but it didn’t really register.  Since it was still there yesterday when the Dr asked me if I had any concerns, I mentioned it.  I felt silly – absolutely sure that he would say it was a bug bite or dry skin and give me some cream for it – but I mentioned it.  Because they (whomever they may be) always say to tell your Dr about stuff like that.  And if nothing else, maybe the cream would make it a little less noticeable during shorts-wearing weather.

So he looked at it, ran his finger across it, measured it.  Then he said he wanted to do a biopsy.

So now, a day later, a little chunk of my leg is in the lab, my shin bone hurts like hell (hopefully the next spot I develop will be on a fleshier part of my body), I discovered that simply hearing the word “cauterize” can cause my stomach to do mad flip flops, and I’m hanging out, waiting for the test results.  I understand that in ANY case this isn’t a life-threatening condition.  But for me, for someone who has had an incredibly lucky/healthy life to this point, it’s an eye-opener.